What to Tell Yourself at 3AM

A note to young leaders.

Last week, a young leader told me he was waking up at 3.00am virtually every night and finding it difficult to go back to sleep.

One of the preconditions for falling asleep is a state of deep relaxation. And there’s nothing less relaxing than worrying about whether you’ll fall back to sleep.

Here’s what I told him:

1. You’re likely being too hard on yourself. Listen to your internal dialogue and make sure you’re speaking to yourself with affection and encouragement.

2. Remind yourself: no matter what problem is occupying your mind at 3.00am, it will look a lot less frightening and a lot more manageable in the morning. Don’t dwell on your problems at 3.00am.

3. The best way to prime yourself to sleep is to tell yourself: “It’s Ok if I don’t fall asleep, I’m happy to just close my eyes and rest.”

Sleep is governed by the subconscious mind – which resembles an innocent child. Reverse psychology works well on it.